The Secret to Saving Any Relationship

Here is the number one way to save any relationship from disaster that nobody ever taught you.

Fantastic new article out. Wanted to summarize for you.

First off, relationships fail mainly because of a lack of communication.

Here’s how to prevent that from ever happening, or what to do if it does occur.

It’s called reflective listening, and the goal isn’t to solve the problem, but simply to let the other person be heard, acknowledged.

If done right, the other person should be like, okay, I feel understood now.

And then you want to go to a quiet place where you both can sit and make eye contact.

And then you find an object, a cup, a cloth, anything, and whoever holds the object, it’s their turn to speak.

And the other person doesn’t speak until they’ve handed the object back.

And so you give them the object and you say something like, help me understand.

Eye contact here is crucial, and you don’t want to roll your eyes or scoff or anything like that. Be genuinely open and interested in what they’re saying.

Once they hand you the object back, try to paraphrase what they were saying, like it sounds like you’re saying or it sounds like that makes you feel. And even check to make sure that you didn’t miss anything.

Thank your partner for sharing and let them know you have a better perspective of the situation.

And then take a quiet pause, look them in the eye, and apologize genuinely for however you might have contributed to the issue.

And then you can actually tackle the problem.

Once your partner feels understood, it’s no longer you versus me, it’s us versus the problem.

And by practicing this, you’ll find these same sentiments coming back to you.

For we all want to be acknowledged, to be understood, to be loved.

Click here for more insights.